Tuesday, March 22, 2011

365 Days!

I feel at a loss.  A loss for my little baby.  For the infant he once was. 

Encouragement fills me as I think about the places he will go and the things he will do.  Puddles he will jump in and frogs he will catch. 

But for a moment, I am allowing myself a bit of sadness.  To grieve the infant stage, to accept that he is no longer smelling of fresh, swaddled goodness. 

My baby boy is One.  He is O-N-E! 


Stay tuned for my reason why we believe that our calling is to be a family of four...and no more.

Friday, March 18, 2011

I think this is normal...

To say that my kids are picky eaters is an understatement.  Meal time is a struggle and we really work with our kids to eat a whole variety of foods.  It generally does not work. Little Girl often refuses to eat what we have before her because she is stubborn and is determined to just say no.  Little Guy on the other hand is just plain picky and does not like much.  Needless to say one of my tactics is to put the food on the table in front of them and walk away.  I keep a close eye, but from a distance.  Usually I get fusses at first. If they are hungry enough they eat, even if just a little bit.  Sometimes I get all out screams and hollers. Depends on the day.

I often get frustrated while feeding Little Guy because he often gets angry with whatever it may be that I am trying to give him.  Please understand that I am patient and try many different foods, but often we just go back to fruit.  He does not like things that most babies love.  Cheese is generally out of the question unless melted (hello choking hazard?!), Chicken is turned away, Tofu is given this pretty tongue-out action and avocado... forgetaboutit!

With Little Girl it is often it is a struggle to just get her to take a taste.  Once she does she sometimes says "Yum!", eats one more bite and then refuses to have any more.  Why?  Because we want her to.  So she won't.  Oh dear, her teenage years will be fun!  Now please understand that she is a very picky eater also, but most of the time she is just being stubborn. 

We sit at the table almost every night as a family.  Scott and I do our best so set a good example of what good eating habits are.  We eat plenty of veggies and wholesome food in front of our children and encourage them to eat along side us.  We do our best to have healthy snacks and often try to encourage wise decisions, but in the end it's a struggle.

Tell me.  What do you do to encourage your children to choose healthy foods?  Do you have "rules" for meal time?  How do you handle picky eaters (at the age of One!)?

Saturday, March 5, 2011

New Lenses

My mind has been full lately.  
Full to the brim.  
Work, kids, husband and family stuff.  
We have been exploring new ventures over here. 
Much energy has been consumed.
  The energy that is generally aimed at keeping a home. 
Dinners have been left undone, laundry has been left in baskets and toys have been left scattered.
But we are doing life.  
Doing it the way we feel it should be done. 
And I looked around and said, "Hey, if a misplaced toy here, or a chicken nugget there, that means were doing life, then that's the way it's going to be." 

And to me,
Focus comes when you bond through tough, busy times.  
You realize that you miss family dinners, cleaned homes and peace.
  So then peace comes, because you crave it.
You want it, you need it.

We are finally slowing down here.
I can feel the beat of the drum.
Slowly the rhythm is coming back.
We needed the crazy, to refocus.
So now we sit with new spectacles on life.
Soaking in the moments we shared and the new moments we will create.

Tuesday, March 1, 2011


You see, I have not posted in two weeks. And if you asked me why I would tell you that it was for a lack of time. But really, it was frustration.

Words were not flowing, my mind was a garbled mess. I tried but I could not form a complete paragraph that made any sense. Below, in the edit box I am currently typing in, are six partially written paragraphs of a mother's thoughts so incomplete it's maddening. Write. Start over. Write. Start over. Leave. Come back. Open computer. Write. Start over...I was searching. For answers, direction, guidance. Wanting to go to others for help, not trying to provide help here. I had none to give. 

Wondering who would judge me for my tactics. If I posted one way, what would the others think? But really it's about my babies. Me. Us.

Frustration. Sleep. Why is it that so many mothers struggle with the sleep of their child. Parenting is tough. I found myself sitting not in the black or white but in the gray. What the heck is the black or white? I really felt, and often feel, that with sleep and babies there is one way or the other. (Read: sleep training or attachment parenting). But I hate it. I get mad at myself when my babies won't nap and cry about it. But then I make them spend consistent time in their crib...like it or not. Am I mean? Or am I doing the "right" thing?

I do not want to get into it. But it boils down to this. I want my babies to be happy. These past two weeks we struggled. And now, we may have a light in the end of the tunnel. He slept today. And was happy the rest. Victory.

Will I still struggle when I feel that the "right" thing to do is let him have a bit of time in his crib mad at life? Absolutely. Will I still feel that annoying feeling when he is not sleeping and refuses to no matter what? You bet. Will I rock him to try to get him to sleep? Sure, if it works.

But here we are. When he is 10, he will be sleeping and I will be wondering why the heck I was loosing sleep over all this. And the "black" and "white" will still be there. But for me. I will sit happily in the gray. Driving myself nuts.

Roll with it Janelle. Roll with it